I love being a mom. That is not to say motherhood is all roses and candy, it is not, but I love it. I always thought I would have a gaggle of babies, imagined myself with double strollers, bouncy seats and baby babble swelling the rooms in my house. Picture one in a bassinet, one in a sling across my chest, and two toddling behind me and now you have a good snapshot of my motherhood fantasy at the age of 25.
However, life didn’t quite work out that way and now I cannot imagine the craziness of having more than one, though I am sure I would have lived up to the challenge and joys of the aforementioned gaggle.
My first Mother’s Day fell on the same weekend as my baby shower. I was 7 months pregnant, stuffing my face with all the fresh green chiles I could get my swollen fingers on, and wading through, rather buoyantly, my in-law’s pool in the desert sun. I was sublimely happy. I was given an emerald ring (my birthstone) as a mommy-to-be gift which I still wear today (it is the only ring I wear since removing my wedding ring 9 years ago).
My daughter loves that story, the story of her in my belly, the desert baby shower, and the ring. The ring will eventually become hers when she is older and I like to think someday she might have a little girl to whom she can pass it.
This Mother’s Day (#12) was as lovely as the first and all the ones in between. My daughter adores the holiday, begins preparing for it weeks in advance. This year she played a song for me, composed especially for the day, baked maple french toasts for breakfast, polished my fingernails a tart shade of red and took me for a nice walk in the park.
Every few hours, she’d stop to ask, “are you having a good day, mom?”
I am one of those women who enjoys the paper crafts, oddly shaped bowls, and all the I-love-Mom jewelry a child’s hand and heart can create.
Every year I write to her a letter on Mother’s Day and tuck into the lavender writing journal I found at a gift shop in Santa Fe, New Mexico the weekend of my baby shower. One day I will give her the journal book full up with letters on this woman’s work.